Why I Stop Labeling My Twinboys


I had this mistake of labeling my twins Introvert Twin and Extrovert Twin. They are so much different in personalities so sometimes it's really hard. It also gets harder when people asked me questions like who is naughtier, kinder, good or bad? 

I know some of the labels are encouraging and positive but it makes damage than you’ll ever know. Yes, I learned it the hard way.

I don’t usually post parenting stuff even if I already have 3 kids because it still feels I am a newbie mom. Every single day, I still learn new things from my kids.

Here let me share my own experience on why I stop labeling my twinboys.

My Twins Gets Discouraged

I’ll call twin A that he will be an artist and he is a great builder while twin B is always independent and wants to work on his own. I found out when calling them this, twin B is discouraged to try building something. He actually doesn’t build if twin A is the one building the blocks or tiny lego toys. He was already discouraged to try something new. What if twin B is a builder too that just needs a little guidance to enhance and push the talent that he might have?

I now discovered that twin B is also good at building cars, blocks and anything imaginative.

My Twins Are Unique Every Single Day

My partner would always say that the twins have this changing trait. When twin A is good in finishing his food for this month and twin B is not, they’ll exchange the next month. I know right? My kids suprises me every single day!

My Twins Will Believed On What You’ll Say

We had this Mcdonald’s Kiddie crew event where he started to cry when he saw a lot of people. Since he is shy and doesn’t like to mingle with people, I usually tell them, “Oh he’s shy and the quiet one”. It turns out to be that way everytime we go out and meet several people. He will never be experienced to be out there and explore if I’ll not put an effort to boost his confidence.

We are still working on this one. I know to be shy and quiet it's not that bad but we can do better.

Lastly, There’s No Good Twin and Bad Twin

I remembered one person (I forgot who it was), pertaining to my other twin said something like this “Maghanda ka na ng pang-pyansa nyan...”. They believed on the superstitious belief about having more than one puyo (he has 3), that he will cause trouble in the future. I answered then jokingly, “Hindi ba pwedeng sa Guidance Counselor muna?”. Sounds funny but then I realized I don’t want anyone from my twins being labeled as the bad one. 

There is no such thing as a bad twin or a good twin. Of course, they are kids, they’ll make mistakes. If one of them misbehaves it doesn’t mean that they are already bad. But if he was already labeled the bad twin, well he might believe it (see reason no: 3) and will not even bother changing it.

There are two different individuals sharing the same birthday. Nothing more, nothing less.

We are still in the process of not labeling the twinboys. This also applies to my younger girl. I hope some people will stop labeling them too. It's not that easy but let’s do our best not to label our kids.

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